I was talking to an old friend. We were trying to reminisce our good memories of our lives when we used to live in the States. We’ve known each other during our time of getting the visa days in Manila. We’ve met there at the US Embassy office over 22 years ago now. We really became good friends ever since then. Reminiscing the waiting at the early hours for the US Embassy office to finally open, wanting to be the first in line. Ha ha ha.. No matter how early me and my sister went there we usually be on the 5th or so in line. But oh well, still happy to be one of the first few people that will enter the place.
What a chaotic place that was when it opened. We had a joke before that when entering the embassy, it felt like entering the public market here in the Philippines. Too noisy. Lol. I’m pretty sure they might be controlled better now, since some of the other transactions were done online. One sample alone was the getting of the visa. During our time we had to go back to the embassy a few days after the interview and get the visa ourselves. Nowadays, they will just mail it to you directly to the address you’ve provided for them to be sent to. More convenient and no hassles of waiting outside the gate and inside the office.
My friend was telling me about her experience in the area where she’s living now. Her and her Pinay friends were so divided just because of gossip and jealousy. My friend, she’s successful talking about financially and her family life. She just had better life than some of the Pinays there in her area. Well, some of her jealous friend spread rumors that’s not even true about her, she just didn’t do anything because she told me that she had better things to do than to think about those jealous girls. That’s the better approach to that I think, just leave it and later the issue will just die down. That’s what I would do too if I were in her shoes. Most of the gossip girls just don’t have something to do in life other than watch other people’s lives. They might be imitating the soap opera or the teleserye on TFC.
I saw a lot of it here too. It’s just not the Filipinos do that kind of thing, I saw and heard expats too. It’s just human nature to get jealous of the success of others. Some know how to control their jealousy, some just plain anger and jealousy that they can’t sleep without destroying other people. It’s just so crazy to think, but it happens. Some were even killing just over jealousy and gossip. It’s just not worth it. The “Crab mentality” is really present not just in the Philippines but all over the world.
Just like my friend was telling me, she was just letting someone borrow something from her. Then she forgot that the other friend had it for a long time. When time for her to use it, she remembered that the friend had it. She then asked the stuff that was borrowed to be returned. The friend was furious because the friend claimed she own the stuff since she had it for a long time. WOW, the friend had the guts to be mad and to think she’s the one that borrowed something. I can’t believed it that my friend was punished for being nice and trying to help out.
At the end she was blamed that its her fault that the friendship was falling apart. No friendship would fall apart if the friend just return the stuff and just say thank you and sorry that it was not return right away and friendship would flourish. Instead the friend just spread rumors and gossip and she even involved other friends. Even her kids she involved them too, which is really ridiculous and crazy for me.
Living with jealousy and anger will not get her life better. My friend is wishing for a happy and peace of mind for her friend. That she should live life to the fullest instead of bitterness.